I'M DRUNK. Off of one beer and too much time. Or too little food... I am smoking cigarettes in my bed drinking cheap booze thinking "how the fuck did I end up here... I am in a trace. A lonely trance, I can't seem to find what it is that I am missing.. And all that comes to mind seems to be... Well, someone. You see I have no friends... Okay that is an exaggeration. I do have friends but they are what I like to call SURFACE. Nothing past the script that you are provided as a child... No one to be real and uncensored with. However, I don't think that I am at a total lose. Well, I probably am. Because I can't seem to get it htrough my head that I have to take time to work on myself before I can ever acheive true happiness. Sure girls come into your life they fuck you then they fuck you up then they leave and you are left thinking "wow that was one great fuck but shit I don't ever want to see them again..." And in all honesty I don't want to see them again. All I want is to fuck as many people I can so that way I might actually feel worth something, even if that something is just a a great lay. But shit, there are worse things to be known for... At least it isn't bad sex. No, if there is one thing that I know I am good at it is sex. Ever girl I have ever been with has gotten off at least once and at least half of them tell me that I am the best that they have ever had. So maybe this sounds a bit arrogant and cocky like I am some sort of womanizer but on the contrary I am not, I just enjoy pleasing people, and you see that is the source of all my problems I can't seem to be happy unless everyone around me is happy which is no way to live a life, trust me.... I know. Anyway fuck I need to go to bed... More tomorrow? I think but you never know... I might be fucking some nameless woman tomorrow.